Two Scary Words

Over the last three-ish months I’ve been wrestling with two very scary words. Nope, not “homework” or “job”, but  

SUPPORT RAISING. 

I hear the word “raise” and I imagine having to lift something very huge and important, like mountains or 500 pound weights. I hear the word “support” and think of crutches or calling somebody in India to fix my computer. None of these sound nice. 

(see, they are both in pain)

Here’s what support raising actually is: asking people to pray and donate money so you can go do what God’s called you to do. That sounds nice. Here’s what some people think it is: you begging them for money so that you can go overseas and have a really fun time. And that is the dilemma I’ve been facing—feeling like the moment I say something about support everyone will think I just want their wallet.

Why is support raising hard? Because it’s not the social norm. Usually when you graduate from college, you get a job, your friends sometimes hear about it on facebook, and maybe you chat with them about it noncommittally when you run into them in Walmart. In support raising, you send out newsletters to tell people about what you’re doing, then you call them about it, and then you ask if they want to support you. You have to be involved with other people and ask them to help you. That’s hard because in this culture, it is more honorable to be self-sufficient than to ask people for help—especially lots of people, some of whom you don’t talk to that often. 

You see my dilemma/fear? It’s similar to the way I’d feel eating an ice cream cone with chopsticks while sitting on stage in a bathing suit. It’s going against the accepted social norm. 

BUT. 

It’s necessary. The expenses that need to be covered are going towards legitimate causes, like getting the TEFL certificate that I have to have to teach in China. If I DIDN’T have a team of people praying for me and cheering me on as I went, my feelings of isolation and discouragement would get in the way of doing the Father's work over there.

Sometimes I ask the Father why He doesn’t just have somebody write me a check for $15,400 and be done with it. He tells me it’s because a  team of people is needed to do this, people He will use to bless me and whom He will use me to bless. He's using me to involve others in His work--which is a gift and a privilege. And He reminds me that, in this process, He will take care of the heavy things while also being my crutch. 

We've got 80% more to go, folks.

My attempt at being self-sufficient.