Sweat and Ice Cream

I knew when I woke up this morning that today would be a day of adventure and sore, sore legs. How did I know this, friends? 

Today, I went here:

Yes, it is what you think it is. No, I never dreamed of going here before this year and I didn't do any backflips or breakdancing on it, but it was pretty cool. 

Right before we exited the bus to make our way to the wall, our leader asked, "Who wants to ride the cable lift?" I thought, oh I'll just climb up and take the scenic route. 

That was a bad life choice. 

Folks, I think the number of stairs I climbed today is equal to the number of stairs I've ever climbed in my entire life. Easily 2,000 stairs, maybe more. If my calf muscles aren't ballin' by tomorrow, I'm going to ask for a refund. 

An example of never-ending stairs leading TO the wall.

An example of never-ending stairs ON the wall.

I have also never been so wet in a situation that didn't involve putting myself in a body of water. See all that humidity? That + my extreme-stair-climbing sweat led to one hot, miserable, wet heap of Laura. By the time we actually got to the wall, I was ready for a shower and a nap. 

I really, really tried to think profound thoughts like, How amazing that we can still walk on this giant structure! and I'm standing on one of the wonders of the world! but I didn't get very far past the sound of my own panting and tropical insects buzzing in my soggy, wet ears. Oh, well. Maybe next time. 

Fortunately, I decided to take the cable back down the mountain....and, unfortunately, was joined by a hornet for the most of the ride. I'm pretty sure the Chinese people heading back up were wondering why the pale white foreign girl was crouching in the corner of her ski lift. 

Upon arrival back at the hotel, I DID get my shower and nap before heading out on the next order of business: my late birthday celebration. 

Our first stop? Pizza Hut, obviously. 

As you can see, it was more of a sit-down experience than your regular pizza buffet deal. I decided to be adventurous and order some...waxberry...juice. I'm not sure who decided to call it a waxberry. It didn't taste like wax. It tasted like purple and fruity and really, really, ridiculously sweet something. 

Our next stop? Cold Stone in the mall. 

It took us a million years to find and wasn't nearly as good as my Marble Slab, but it was worth it to even get that close. Cheesecake, oreos, and fudge. Yes, please. This means, of course, that I'm OFFICIALLY 22--fully celebrated and on my way. 

This week we also began TEFL classes (every day but today, obviously). OH MY WORD. Taking three courses of classes in three weeks is a feat comparable to climbing up to the Great Wall. By the time I meet my babies in September, I'm going to be one giant heap of brain-and-leg muscle-mush. 

And that actually sounds pretty gross.